You might be a writer if…

1. Some of your best ideas were originally written on napkins, Kleenex, or toilet paper.
2. You wake up at three in the morning and sneak out of bed to spend a couple of hours alone with your computer.
3. When people act like jerks, you appear to handle it maturely, then secretly fashion characters after them to exact your revenge.
4. You pull over to the side of the road a few times each week to jot down ideas for your book.
5. A family member interrupts your work to ask you a simple question and you turn into a screaming lunatic.
6. The most fulfilling conversations you have are between you and your imaginary muse.
7. When your lucky underwear really stinks, friends know you’ve been fortunate not to get any bad reviews for several weeks.
8. You log into your publishing account while you’re eating lunch to check on your royalties.
9. In the middle of the night, you wake up sweating with an irrational fear that some discovered your secret pen name.
10. You routinely turn down invitations to parties in favor of working on your book.

Copyright © 2014 Chris McMullen